Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Bring your Teddy Bear to Work Day 2015

Hi.  My name is April.  Yes I know (sigh), it's a rather frivolous name and I am also a rather strange purpley color.  Not what I would have chosen, but it is what it is and I have to live with it.  Speaking of living, I live in the blue house with The Lady and The Tramp.

I also admit to being fluffy and soft, not very unlike the famous Winnie the Pooh.  He is however, a Bear of Very Little Brain.  On the contrary, I am a Very Intelligent Bear and of rather Serious Countenance.  The Lady has several times threatened to stitch me a smile.  Thankfully, I have found if I just ignore her she soon forgets about it again and lets me alone.

As it is an Important Holiday today, I was invited down off the bureau where I reside and included in many activities of the day.  The Lady has typed this diary for me per my dictation.  I was hoping to be given the operation of the mouse, but had to settle for the number pad.  I ask you!  How many numbers are there in a typical post?  I ended up being a Bit Disgusted with the whole thing.

Putting that issue aside, The Lady and I kept ourselves busy and when Reflected Upon, it was a rather pleasant change for me.  I even stopped to take in the sun with Piglet for a while (yes Pooh, I have a Piglet too).  Piglet, on the whole, is an intelligent little dog (as are the other three....well mostly), but Oh. So. Loud.  If she could manage to not lead the pack in barking at every creature or vehicle that comes into the neighborhood it would be a better show of her intelligence.  Don't you think?  In the meantime, I can appreciate her skill at finding an excellent sunbeam to bask in.....though we should possibly move down a stair at this hour.

After making the bed, a Large Task for Such A Small Bear, even one of Great Intelligence....

making iced tea....

having breakfast, though I did not Particularly Appreciate being used as an iPhone stand for the duration (humpf!)....

and watering the plants....

The Lady performed her physical therapy.  The only place in the house heavy enough to hold the exercise bands is the bunk beds, amongst The Small One's toys.  Hmmmm.  I can see why The Lady dislikes the task of changing the sheets on the bunks.  A bear as intelligent as myself could Suggest Alternatives, but I wasn't asked so I haven't chosen to share them.

We filled the bird feeders.  As I am a Smallish Bear, I was not very thrilled with the murder of crows squabbling amongst themselves overhead.  Crows are not unintelligent and I suspect I would be rejected as Not Good Food, but I'd rather not test the theory thankyouverymuch.

Next we moved to the driveway to put a second coat of semi-gloss white on the underside of The Lady's new sewing machine table.  Now if I had been asked (WHEN will they ever learn?) I would have pointed out, that despite the Extreme Pleasantness of the day, painting on a breezy day, under the trees (in autumn no less), is not the brightest idea.  The Lady seemed happy enough though, so once again I Reserved Comment and she got on with her painting.

Baking.  How interesting.  This is not something I would normally be involved with as I don't spend much time in the kitchen.  First the dishwasher needed emptying.  Somewhat difficult for a Bear Of Small Stature though it certainly did not require my Superior Intellect.  Loading the dishwasher however, is a job reserved for The Tramp who, like me, suffers from Excessive IQ.  The Lady doesn't bother because it will all get rearranged by The Tramp, who takes the execution of his art Very Seriously.  Ah well, to each his own.  I'm upstairs on the bureau so it's not something I need worry myself about.

But I digress. I assisted in the best way I could and then we moved on to baking.  Something called Healthier Caramel Apple Bread.  Anything to do with caramel is Fine By Me.  Caramel is a Serious and Thoughtful confection, second only to hunny, whereas chocolate indicates a Paucity of Character.    (That earned me a glare from The Lady.)

Gluten-free baking requires an amazing number of ingredients!  And these are just the dry ones.  Good grief.  The Tramp has much to be thankful for.  I learned The Lady has a second refrigerator in the garage to store all the grains and flours, to say nothing of a double upper cabinet and a section of the pantry.

Yes I dipped in the caramel bag.  Don't judge!

After the bread went in to bake, we went back outside to turn the table over so the top could get painted.  The Lady was quite smug and pointed out there were no leaves or twigs stuck to her paint.  Just a few little bugs to brush off.  But she had her comuppance.  Something was obviously wrong, the table wasn't glossy!  Tee hee hee.  She had grabbed and opened the can of primer by mistake!  Oh my my!  I almost wet my artificial fur.  The Lady somewhat acidly pointed out that this was one time I could have Spoken Up.

Tee hee hee hee!  Here I go again, legs crossed.  Oh my!  I can't even look at her while I'm dictating.  Gasp! 

Repainting was successful this time around (so she says), and we walked down to collect the mail on the offchance there would be something more interesting than flyers and credit card offers.  There wasn't.

And took the bread out of the oven.  Smell that!  Ohhhhhh......I think it's terribly unfair stuffed bears can't have any.

Sadly, dinner was nothing to take pictures of.  It was eaten in front of computers.  A definite Lack Of Discipline by the resident humans.  Illustrated by the grains of salt The Lady keeps finding under her mouse.   Biting my furry tongue!

Sewing was more straightforward than the painting today.  The Lady made a swap block from fabrics out of the other person's "bucket."  Not bad.  I kept the seam ripper handy anyway.

The Sailor Son has been promised a rag quilt and The Lady finished cutting up and folding flannel shirts for it.  Okaaaay.  Seems a bit nonsensical, all this extra work.  I couldn't even lift those big scissors!  What strange concept am I missing?

She also finished cutting up hundreds of squares and rectangles from other thrifted shirts (five bins to choose from!!) for a Bonnie Hunter workshop in November.  I suppose there is some Method to this Madness, but my Superior Brain is quite puzzled.  In solidarity with me, The Tramp has been known to point out on occasion the weirdness of Cutting Up fabric into little pieces just so it can be Sewn Back Together.  Of course if there were a small quilt in it for me I might Change My Thinking a bit.

The day is winding down now and the top of the bureau is calling me.  First I'm assisting The Lady with her toilette.

And assisting Piglet with un-making the bed.

Good night to you.  I hope you had a very pleasant Holiday.  I know I did.


Jenny said...

Oh Katie, you had me laughing out loud! What a delightful tale of little April's busy day.

Lois McCoy said...

love love love it! :)